... the verdict

So last night I woke up (again) at 3:30 a.m.  Has anyone seen "The Fourth Kind"?  I haven't, but for some reason in this semi-lucid state I remembered an ad that said something like "most alien abductions occur at 3:33 a.m." - so I started to panic thinking I was going to be taken up at any minute.  I woke up enough to calm down, then started worrying about what the day would bring.  There was lightening, thunder, and rain going on - and I thought uh-oh, I hope this isn't a bad sign! 


Well, I kept waking up, then falling asleep, then waking up... eventually Blake's alarm went off, and it was kind of a welcome thing to give me a reason to get up and going!  I took the trash out, made him a sandwich, and started to get ready to go to my appointment.

As I started to drive, I put on my "Baby Hopes" playlist.  I kept thinking "I sure hope this is positive!", but kept running through what I would do when they called to say it wasn't.

I listened to "This is the Day" by The The - the lyrics seemed particularly salient today:

Well, you didn't wake up this morning cause you didn't go to bed
You were watching the whites of your eyes turn red
The calendar on your wall is ticking the days off
You've been reading some old letters
You smile, and think how much you've changed
All the money in the world couldn't buy back those days

You pull back the curtains, and the sun burns into your eyes
You watch a plane flying across the clear blue sky
This is the day, your life will surely change
This is the day, when things fall into place

You could have done anything, if you wanted
And all your friends and family think that your lucky
But the side of you they'll never see, is when you're left alone with the memories that hold your life together, like glue.

You pull back the curtains and the sun burns into your eyes,
you watch a plane flying across the clear blue sky,

This is the day,your life will surely change,
this is the day when things fall into place.

As I drove, I kept worrying that the rain was a bad sign.  I looked to my left, though, and noticed a beautiful break in the clouds, with a few beams of light shining down on the hills among some low-lying clouds.  I thought that is beautiful!  Maybe it was a little sign of hope for me? :)

I got to the clinic about 9:03 a.m.  Nancy (the MA) drew my blood about 9:20, and said they'd call with results in a few hours.

I got to my car and called Blake to let him know that, and Tom (my Mom's husband) left a message asking "when we'd find out if the embryos had posted the "Home Sweet Home" sign".  I was a little annoyed - how would I know when they would call, and who says things like that?!!!  But I was also really tired.

I called and talked to my Mom - she thought they would have told us an exact time for when the results would be in - I was like, what doctor's office knows exactly when they will call???  I told her I'd call as soon as I found something out.  She said she'd be sitting waiting by the phone all day until I called.

I called Danielle and spoke with her for a minute, then got home and started cleaning.  Lucky Blake - when I am stressed I clean!!! :)

Danielle called and we were talking for a while again - I think primarily about how I couldn't figure out how I would react if it was positive; that I was trying to prepare for bad news; etc.  I was on the phone with her at 11:05 a.m. when the phone rang and it was the RCC!  So I told her they were calling and I'd call her right back.

I answered and it was Angie, the Nurse Practitioner.  I think I said "how are you?" and she said "fine - I'm calling with good news..." and I started bawling or something.  She said my test was positive - my HCG is 174 and they like it to be > 100, so it looked promising.  I couldn't stop crying and she said "don't worry - you can cry, scream, and celebrate all weekend!"  This is why it is nice to know the nurses there have been through this and know what it's like!

So... I'm pregnant!  About 4 1/2 weeks using the "traditional" calendar (starts with the first day of your last period).  :)

I made a few calls - it took me about 1/2 hr to get my Mom on the phone (so much for waiting by the phone! ;) - all good though!) - and I thought I better post to the blog now.

This is so, so early, and there is still a long way to go, and much could happen, so I'm hoping to keep it a little private, at least through the first trimester.

The next step will be to have an ultrasound on Oct 18.  This is called a "pregnancy ultrasound" or "viability scan" to check out the embryo(s), determine how many there are, rule out an ectopic pregnancy, etc.  If all goes well there, I'll make my first Ob/Gyn appointment!

So - I keep taking Crinone (progesterone supplement), 81 mg baby aspiring, and my prenatal vitamin, and must keep my blood sugars under excellent control.

SOOOO exciting!!! :)  Thanks everyone for your thoughts and prayers.  I give you all credit in this little miracle and am continuing to keep fingers crossed things will continue to progress normally/on target!

If anything changes, it is nice to know we have so much support.  Thank you!!!

Oh, and if you'd like to know,  this is about what the embryo(s) looks like this week (from http://www.babycenter.com/fetal-development-images-4-weeks ):

Week 5 is when the neural tube and organs start forming, so a huge blessing to know to be keeping my blood sugars as excellent as possible in order to let things grow as they should! 

Have an AMAZING weekend - we have my niece's baptism tomorrow, a friend's baby blessing Sun, and I teach YW Sun.  Oh and I need to do my monthly report for work!  It will be a fast, and fun, weekend!

We are going to celebrate somewhere fun tonight... not sure where yet, but what a great day! :)