PUPO and halfway through the TWW! :)

First - I decided to change the blog format - love it?  Hate it?  Let me know what you think! :)

This week actually went by REALLY fast - happy to see just 7 days to go until we find out if this round worked or not! :) I think this week may go even faster - we are going to the zoo, zoo, zoo (don't you wanna come too, too, too?) ;) (had to say it!) tomorrow with Julie and Celine (two of our nieces), and it's conference weekend, and we've got a bunch of errands (cleaning, groceries, etc.) to take care of, then next week I have meetings starting at 8 a.m. on Mon, culminating in our Bureau's "All Hands meeting"/party on Thurs afternoon. Lots to stay busy! :)

Until then, I am "PUPO" - pregnant until proven otherwise - which is an odd place to be honestly! Most people don't see the little balls of cells that may implant - it's a special privilege, and kind of maddening at this point - but really cool. :)

I have noticed the past couple of days I feel a little nauseous and dizzy. I'm taking this as a good sign since the trigger shot HCG should be dissipating. But I totally understand I could be psychosomatic in this in my hopes that we are truly pregnant!

Also - I've been having heartburn. I thought maybe this was a good sign, too, and it may be - but in looking at early signs of pregnancy, I learned that progesterone is the culprit that causes the stomach sphincter to loosen/lets acid back into the esophagus (this = heartburn), so knowing I'm taking a progesterone supplement, it's hard to say if this is truly meaningful or not.

Of course I'm still a little moody... we'll take that as a good sign, too, though stress, progesterone, residual HCG, and usual hormones around this time of month could easily account for that (sorry Blakee...) :)

I'm SOOOO tired - but again, progesterone is known to do that, and I'm taking the supplement.

I seem to be having some digestive issues - also not uncommon with the hormones going on.

BUT - in the spirit of PUPO :) - I have been looking into what is happening with the embryo(s) assuming they are doing what they should be doing?

I found a picture at http://pregnacyweekbyweek.info/pregnancy-week-by-week-week-3.html that is pretty cool to show what they should look like:


Yep - still mostly a ball of cells. :) They should be dividing into three layers - one that will become the placenta (interface with the uterus where maternal/fetal blood exchange occurs to provide nutrients, oxygen, etc. to the developing embryo/fetus), one that will become the amniotic sac (which the embryo/fetus will develop within - it provides protection/cushioning), and (of course!) one that will become the embryo/fetus itself. I know many of you probably already know all of that!!! Here is an illustration from http://www.babycenter.com/fetal-development-images-3-weeks that shows this better than the ball of cells image above: :)

What I'm really hoping for, of course, is that both embryos have implanted! This would look kind of like this illustration (from http://www.babycenter.com.sg/i/devel/twins/03weeks_424x302.jpg):


(P.S. Sorry about the naked bum - I couldn't find any images that didn't include it - just life, but I know some people are sensitive. Don't worry - none of these are MY naked bum!!! :) )

So... fingers crossed! According to an IVF calculator I looked at, implantation would be complete tomorrow. I've been having some minor cramping (and one spell of kind of bad cramping last night), but no bleeding - I am taking this as a good sign, too (though it's not uncommon for me to get cramping around this time - but I've never known I have embryos trying to do their thing before - VERY uncommon!) :)

The last few days I've been running through scenarios of when we get our blood results. It's kind of sad, but I'm having a MUCH easier time envisioning getting a negative vs. a positive, only because I've received THAT news before, after positive digital HPTs, twice. Granted, that experience wasn't a public one, and I hadn't seen the embryos or anything. But I can envision myself telling people, crying a bit, and looking for the positives in trying this again (e.g. I know now this goes by pretty fast, if we do it again, maybe we'll get some to freeze, I would know what to expect, etc.)

BUT... I REALLY WANT THIS TO HAVE WORKED!!! All I can envision so far about getting a positive is me saying "are you serious?" and bursting into tears (happy tears, of course!) :) I know there will be no guarantees that all will go well if it's positive, but at least we'll be another step closer, and I believe that will feel good and so exciting!!! :) So... here's hoping I get this news! :)

Blake gave me a blessing the other night - after, we talked for a bit, and our conclusion was this is a very exciting time, and totally out of our hands. All I can do is try to eat well, drink lots of water, sleep well, and take care of myself (including taking my prenatal vitamin, baby aspirin, and Crinone); all Blake can do is try to be supportive and kind, and all we can do is pray and try to be kind to each other.

We'll know soon enough and will either 1) (hopefully!) continue with the bewilderment, joys, and pains of a developing pregnancy, or 2) start another IVF round. At least we have a plan either way!

Enjoy your day!!! I'm off to lunch with a friend, getting bday gifts for several people, and working on reviewing some grant documents for work. :)